Gone

“Never seen you coming, I’ll turn you down

When you need me the most, I will turn you

When you need me the most, I will turn you down

Never seen me coming, I'll turn you down

When you need me the most, I will turn you

When you need me the most, I will turn you down”

She laid there motionlessly, waiting for darkness to devour her, to knock her unconscious.

It never did come.

Tick, tock, tick, tock. She hears the clock ticking.

Thump, thump, thump. She hears her heart beating.

Pitter, patter. She hears the rain falling.

Ding. She hears her 4am alarm ringing.

Eyes wide open, she’s still waiting but alas, sleep continues eluding her.

I gotta get better, I gotta get better.

(And maybe we'll work it out)

She chants her sleep mantra.

She closed her eyes.

Asking questions through the ceiling, never know what you’re thinking.

I’m afraid that what we had is gone.

Flashbacks of haunting memories attacked her.

She flinched and threw her eyes open.

Sleep is never going to come.

She hears a crackle in a distance.

Great, thunderstorm.

She slips on a black cardigan and reached for the door.

She stepped barefoot onto the overgrown lawn.

She felt the angry splatter of the unforgiving raindrops on her skin.

Feet all muddied, she dug them further into the ground.

Is it tears or just the fucking rain?

How much of this is reality and how much of it isn’t?

Why did we climb and fall so far?

Hair all wet, she reached for her silent phone in her cardigan pocket.

She took a quick glance at her locked screen.

No notification.

One Mississippi. Love me till the day I die.

Two Mississippi. You made me believe you’re mine.

Three Mississippi. Last goodbye.

I don’t wanna lose your touch, I don’t wanna hurt this much. I can feel you slipping away.

Fingers trembling, she unlocks her phone.

Delete. We don't talk anymore.

Delete. It's something we don't do.

Delete. 'Cause once you go without it. Nothing else will do.

She looked up and felt a new sensation: Warmth

Sun’s finally coming up.

She stood up and let her soaking wet oversized, dark cardigan fall off her shoulders.

Then I look in my heart, there’s a light in the dark.

In her silver nightgown, she took a step towards the whisper behind the light.

If you get lost in the light, it’s okay I can see in the dark.

The last thing she ever saw was a powerless girl lying motionlessly waiting for the dark to devour her.

* Inspired by Zayn's Entertainer.